What’s a hymen? Tt’s a bit of girl that covers the vaginal area until she has sex. Yes, a freshness seal. Do not consume if opened. Yeah, that’s what a lot of people think. People picture the hymen like it’s one of those paper banners at a sports game. They think it covers up a lady’s vagina, and then when she has sex for the first time,it gets busted. Seems pretty accurate. Yep, let’s go play video games. No, you don’t. Everything about that is wrong.
Ok, think about it, if our hymen’s completely sealed our vaginas, where would our periods go? I mean, we’d blow up like the blueberry girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Oh yea, and where would you pee? You know we don’t pee out of our vaginas, right? We pee out of our urethras. Which is a separate hole. And our school district is very underfunded. So that’s how many holes total? The hymen is actually a thin, stretchy bit around the vagina. In most women, our hymens have an o
pening that’s big enough for tampons, fingers, and yes, gettin’ busy.
But it’s not like a barrier. It’s more like a balloon arch. Ok, but doesn’t the hymen break the first time you have sex? Like doesn’t it hurt? It doesn’t have to. It might if you’re not careful with it. But, it can also tear from doing the splits, or just living our lives. Even then, hymens can heal. And a lot of them never even get torn in the first place. One study found that 52% of sexually active teenage women had intact hymens. The hymen as you understand it is a straight up myth. Ok, Emily, are you sure about that? Maybe you should call in an expert. that’s a good call.
Our bodies don’t come with built in virginity detectors, and sex isn’t supposed to hurt the first time. But this horrible idea is everywhere in our culture. Even the New York Times gets it wrong. The Times knows more about regional politics in Finland than the female body. Honestly, the worse part is the word daddy. Yea, that is inappropriate. It gets way worse than band names. In some parts of the world, women are forced to show government officials that their hymen is intact. If they don’t, they can be denied jobs, barred from making rape accusations, even thrown in jail. I know that this is usually the point where you do some cute visual gag. Yeah, virginity exams are straight up sexual assault, and they don’t even prove anything because the hymen doesn’t work that way. Physically speaking, virginity doesn’t exist. It’s just something we made up to be mean to women, I learned something. That felt great.